Perspective - Revision/Addendum
Friendship and Mutual Values
I wrote my letter and was smart enough to ask my wife to review it. She asked a very simple question:
"What is the purpose for this letter?"
I responded that I wanted to establish the value of this friendship and understand where it was going. That I didn't want to have a relationship that was totally superficial.
She asked another good question: "So is this whole issue about you then and not (name)?"
With that I had to reflect and realized she was (as is often the case) correct. This was all about me. What I wanted (name) to do and how I wanted him to respond. she and I talked further, and I realized that my letter would be more of an attack or ultimatum than an inquiry into our relationship. So for now I am going to see where he and I go. If it turns out there is nothing there the process need not be confrontational but one of slow attrition. I know - really know - I want more from this friendship (from all my friendships) and that I am always willing to give more... I will find out if that is his desire as well and proceed accordingly.
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